March 21, 2011

New Beginnings~

Mom is moving today! She is leaving rehab and moving into Seabury, a nursing home with a wonderful reputation and excellent staff. I am thrilled. Thank you Dad and Johanna for being there.

I have noticed a new feeling that has emerged within me since caring for mom a few weeks ago. It is a bit startling; and so sweet.

I miss my mom!

I have never missed my mom. But, as I have shared in previous blogs, my sisters and I are seeing a side of my mother we rarely witnessed. Her ability to communicate her love to us is nothing short of miraculous, and is such a blessing. Growing up, my mother did not even like to be touched, let alone hugged. Being able to rub lotion into her feet, legs, hands, stroke her face, laugh with her, and give her kisses is so remarkable. And, without me even noticing, has cracked open a place in my heart that I had long ago sealed off. This "missing" of her is painful, but I am so happy to be experiencing this too!

I can hold my tenderness and with deep appreciation thank my mother for who she was, and who she is now, and see how our shared pain has made me the mother I am today.

I miss you mom~