"I can't trip again"~
Uttered by my mother tonight while we were feeding her dinner. How alarmingly accurate and perceptive. We joked with her -- "You're right mom, you can't trip again!"
It's one day at a time. Tomorrow she will be weighed again. Her weight will be a significant factor in our decision making. I told mom I was leaving tomorrow, and that I would miss her. She heard me and settled into that "place" where she taps into an uncanny awareness and is fully present. "Oh, I will miss you," she said with loving eyes. "I'll be back, mommy." She answered, "That will make me very, very happy".
I know many of you who are reading this can relate and understand the depth of gratitude I felt for those precious few words. Her expression of love for me is so healing. In the past, my mother found it very difficult to express her true emotions. I said to my father, years ago when mom was first diagnosed with Alzheimer's, "It's too bad Mom had to lose her mind to find her heart."
I am soaking in her love, and her incredible ability to express the love she feels for us despite her cognitive functioning. My dad, and two sisters, celebrate with me. We are truly blessed in the midst of our pain.
I thank each of you who are reading, listening and absorbing. I know that I am not alone and this brings great peace.