"Real compassion kicks butt and takes names and is not pleasant on certain days. If you are not ready for this FIRE, then find a new-age, sweetness and light, perpetually smiling teacher and learn to relabel your ego with spiritual sounding terms. But, stay away from those who practice REAL COMPASSION, because they will fry your ass, my friend." - Ken Wilber
My daughter is a master at "real compassion". I have watched her over the years 'kick some ass' with her friends. She is always loving, but firm. "This behavior is unacceptable. I am your friend, I love you, but I will not participate in this (shop lifting) in any way. When you stop, we can hang out again."
I sure wish I had these boundaries at her age. And her ability to cut right to the chase and clearly delineate what is right for her, and her friends is remarkable. She holds compassion for all her friends while wisely counseling them on sex, drugs, smoking and drinking. Zoe is not coming from a religious perspective, but from a deep sense of caring. Rather than being offended, her friends seek her out like a soothing balm.
I have learned a lot watching my daughter. In many ways, she is my teacher.